Trade Secrets

I think it was the US Army that used to recruit with the slogan "It's the toughest job you'll ever love". It's a good slogan, you can see why they chose it.
The thing is, I think I've heard a lot of other careers described with similar sentiments; pastoring, teaching, counseling, social work, nursing,...
At the risk of causing offense to a lot of people I really like and respect, I think many of those jobs really aren't that tough. At least they don't have to be.
I've seen some people in most of those fields who are really not excellent at what they do. The basic processes or systems of the field are sound enough that if you just follow along it works out a lot of the time. It's still a lot of work in most cases, but maybe not as incredibly hard as we tell ourselves.
That's not meant to suggest that a lot of people in these fields are coasting and generally incompetent; just that excellence is pretty rare.
Before I became a pastor, and certainly in my first few years of it, I bought into that. I had this sense that my role was incredibly difficult and I had to employ all my energies to fulfill the expectations. I was partly right I guess. It did take everything I had in me to try to meet the expectations.
As time went by I realised that I could be a whole lot more effective if I stopped trying so hard and gave up on the idea of being a great pastor; just accepted the role of being myself as best I can.
Of course it didn't turn out exactly as I hoped since I'm not a pastor anymore, so I guess I'm not one of the excellent ones.
Still, I really don't regret it. There were people who really wanted me to just play the part of pastor the way others did, and I refused. I couldn't feel right about that.
Bottom line is this I guess (after this rambling rant); there are lots of fields that are well developed enough that mediocre is actually pretty good. The only way to find out how capable we really are is to step outside the system and try something risky. In my case it didn't work out, our church plant closed and I'm going to be doing something else for a living for a while at least. But I'm glad to not be playing along.

p.s. I'm not saying everyone has to do what I did or that people who don't are mediocre. But if you're annoyed reading this and wondering if I've got you in mind as I write, you can feel free. You're probably wrong about my opinion of you, but if it makes you sincerely ask whether you're excellent or mediocre it's worth it to have you ticked...

What if we didn't know...

Religion Profile:

We are considering an ancient religion that can now be found in widely differing expressions in many places around the world, though it may not be recognizable to it’s original founders.
Multiple divinities and many other spiritual beings can be identified in their sacred texts and worship, although they offer a mostly confusing explanation of themselves as monotheistic.
There is some dispute about the identity of the founder of the religion with two primary candidates, one of which claimed to have a supernatural vision of the former, though they never met in life. Many adherents claim to have similar visions with varying degrees of frequency. The prominence of mystical elements is common in the worship, though some make no personal claim of such experience and consider it suspect among others.
Another outstanding feature of their worship is the practice of ritualistic symbolic cannibalism. Some practice this only rarely, others at every gathering and even in private. Many use it as a rite of passage into adulthood.
Currently there are such wide varieties of expression in their worship gatherings that an outsider would be unlikely to see them as part of the same faith. The relative success of this religion is rooted in broad adaptability to cultures, though this causes a great deal of controversy among adherents who often argue that their own particular expression of the faith is the only one that is true to the founders.
There have been many dramatic and violent schisms which have become permanent, though there are occasional brief attempts to reconcile.
There is some confusion about the sacred texts. While there is general agreement that the title is “The Book” (English translation); the separate texts included within that cover vary significantly, and the degree to which they are considered authoritative or relevant causes further dispute.
Clearly, it is nearly impossible to describe this religion accurately because there is little that all adherents can agree on. The history is full of violence, conflict, and difficulty. It is ironic that the founder spoke of himself as the way, the truth, and the life and is worshipped as the Prince of Peace. Christianity is a very complex religion.

Kids and Careers

Last weekend I had two interesting experiences.
Saturday night I went to a high school reunion to see some people I haven't spoken to in 16 years. Sunday we celebrated my oldest brother's 40th birthday.
It was good to talk with some old friends on Saturday night and get updates on their life stories. With few exceptions the conversations didn't go much beyond where we live and work and who we live with.
Maybe the reason I hesitated about going was partly because I'm not working right now (though I have just agreed to an interesting new position starting in February), and it's still a little tough to not be a pastor anymore.
But I think the real doubt was just that I didn't want to bother going to see people I haven't seen in so long if I wasn't going to see them again for another 16 years. As it turns out I enjoyed it and it was nice to catch up with folks. I'll have to see if it leads to any further contact.
For my brother's birthday we gave him 40 different beers from around the world. Which meant he really couldn't transport them home on the bus, so I got to spend an extra hour with him on the drive to Toronto. We had one of the best conversations I can remember. It started with typical work and relationship stuff, but before long we were discussing things that motivate us, give meaning to our lives, and the struggles that come when those things aren't working the way we want them to.
The bottom line is this; as much as I enjoyed Saturday night, I long for conversations like I had on Sunday. Kids and careers are central aspects of life (certainly mine). But for many of us there is something deeper happening under the surface that rarely gets touched. That's where I want to relate.

Maybe it's not that difficult...

Everyone I know is an evangelist...Everyone.

It's something we do constantly without often having any intent or even awareness that we are doing it.

It rarely offends anyone, is most often done quite sensitively and leaves most people with a clear opportunity to respond.

We are all evangelists; sharing with friends, colleagues, and neighbours the good news we've discovered about restaurants, TV shows, and music.

Few of us hesitate to mention in conversation that we ate a good meal out last weekend. We're comfortable hearing that from a friend and naturally consider whether we might want to have a similar meal ourselves without feeling threatened. We feel free to ask more about the restaurant, where it is, how expensive it is, whether there's a dress code or not... We might even suggest going with out friend the next time they go.

We're also comfortable telling others about new friendships we've made in most cases without pressure. If there seems to be commonality between our two friends we might even suggest introducing them or doing something together.

But somehow when it comes to Jesus it takes on this ominous tone. We cramp up and feel overwhelmed and unequipped. Churches spend big money on Evangelism plans, courses, and materials. We hope that some other person with the gift of evangelism will take on this onerous burden.

Salespeople generally know that a personal reference is the most valuable marketing tool. We just bought a car from a dealer because they had given my parents a good deal and they gladly did the same for us.

I wonder what would happen if we just determined to speak as openly about our faith and our churches as we do of our favourite movies...

Obstructed Views

At sports events and concerts sometimes people find themselves stuck behind a post or peering around the edge of the bleachers to see the action. At best it's an annoyance, and in most cases it's noted on the ticket so you've got some advance warning. The problem would be if somehow we thought that what we can see from behind the post was the whole game.

All too often that happens in our faith. Various obstacles interfere with us getting a clear view of Jesus. Sometimes it's our sin that gets in the way; but a lot of the time it can be caused by the churches we're a part of. We layer beliefs, doctrines, traditions, and practices on top of each other so much that I fear we've buried Jesus.

The problem is that it's nearly impossible to dig him out again since we usually don't know what the obstructions are...

The Imaginary Jesus

This morning I led the service at St Mark's United Church where I grew up. It's always a challenge to know what to communicate to a group I don't know.
What we ended up digging into was Matthew 16 where Simon Peter realizes that Jesus really is the Christ, but then Jesus shows him that even that revelation wasn't complete.

I think pretty much everyone in our culture has some ideas about Jesus. We can imagine him to some degree depending on our background, experiences, and what we've been exposed to. If we take a few minutes and consider a few questions we can draft a picture of our own imaginary Jesus. Try these to get started:

1. When you imagine Jesus, what does he look like? (appearance, race,
build, clothing, setting, etc.)




2. When you imagine Jesus, what sorts of things do you most often picture
him doing?




3. What do you imagine Jesus saying?




4. When you imagine Jesus, what emotions do you imagine him expressing?




5. What sort of political views do you imagine Jesus to have?




6. Who do you imagine Jesus hanging around with?




7. What do you imagine Jesus being passionate about?




8. What would your imaginary Jesus most likely say to you?



I'd love to hear some thoughts back!

Doing it right

Last Sunday was the closing service for our church.
I really wasn't sure how any of us would react.
We tried to design a gathering that would be honest about the hurt and confusion many of us are feeling, but still ultimately focus on God's good faithfulness. I think we managed it...
There were a couple moments that really struck me hard. Knowing how disappointed some people were and still seeing them choose to sing songs honouring God was nearly overwhelming. Hearing pledges of continued faith as we prayed at the end of the service impacted me too.
So, as much as I do truly wish that we were continuing; there is some consolation in seeing that we were able to help one another deal with the emotions in a real way. After continually talking about authenticity the whole time we existed as a church it meant a lot to see us living it in a challenging time.
I don't know what might be next for our people. I know some are trying to figure out a way to explore possibilities of continuing in some form and that would really interest me. Still, there's certainly no guarantee of that coming together. In the mean time we've got to start looking for a church for our family.
This weekend I'm speaking (for what will probably be the last time) at Forestview Oakville. Again, I don't know if that will draw up some emotion. But I do know that I can go back there with a sense that what we did with the Hamilton congregation was risky, bold, and faithful. That's not a bad way to sign off.

This Time It's Personal

It's been a long time since I've posted here. I've been updating the blog at my church fairly regularly over the last year and a half so you can catch up with my ponderings from then at: http://forestviewchurch.ca/Blogs/Chris/

The big news in my world is that the decision has been made to close down our congregation that I've been pastoring for the last 17 months. There's a lot of competing emotion and thoughts for me in this (it wasn't my choice). Still, I come back to a confidence that those who made the decision are people I trust and respect, even if I don't necessarily agree with them. I know that they are people of prayer who's sincere desire is to honour God and be caring towards people.

I don't know what will be next for me. The first priority is to do my best to help our congregation through this transition; whether that's into another church or into some new form of gathering together. After that I know I need to get some rest from the last seven years of church work and do the hard work of figuring out who I am if I'm not leading this church anymore. I'll also finally finish my Masters degree by Christmas.

More than likely this will become my outlet for the next few months. Feel free to hang around for the ride and chip in with your thoughts too.

An Inconvenient Lie

Al Gore created global warming.

Yes, its entirely true and I will prove it right here and now. So pull up a comfy futon and a pleasurable beverage and sit at the feet of your instructor...

Many of you (okay, I know "many" people is a gross exaggeration of my readership, but I digress). Many of you have probably seen Gore's propaganda film "An Inconvenient Truth". I have not yet seen movie but why should that prevent me exposing it as a cheap means of seeking political office.

See, Gore is a keen observer of the American political scene and surely he has noted that throughout that history (at least in the last four years) it has been a sure means of election to create a major crisis and claim to be able to resolve it. Actually fixing anything doesn't seem all that important, at least if you're already in your second term.

So what should we do?

It's simple. We need to refuse to vote for Al Gore. It's our duty as Canadians!

So, Gore created global warming. He personally invented it and will use his movie to ensure he gets to be president. A shrewd move isn't it!?!

"Koino-nicotine"

New friend Dave Stone is an interesting guy, he's the only person I know who ever attempted a Christian Keg Party (not a roaring success but you gotta love the creativity).
After church on Sunday we were talking about the real source of Christian unity and we realised that the Church has something to learn from smokers. (yup, I said it)
Too often church people find their unity in shared morality, shared politics, even shared activities. None of those things are necessarily bad, they're just not the things that are supposed to bring us together.
Remember the story Jesus told about the Pharisee and the tax collector at prayer (Luke 18 for those keeping score)...
Christian unity is properly based on one thing; we are messed up people who know that we need Jesus desperately in this life and for whatever happens when this life is over.
Finding our commonality in all that other stuff doesn't make us Christian, it makes us religious, political, and demographically consistent. We're the Pharisees

Smokers understand this way better than we do. We all see them, the social lepers huddling in uncomfortable herds outside the buildings where respectable people mingle. They try to ignore the scornful glances as they publically prove that there is something unhealthy in their lives. There's an almost admirable honesty in it really.

Every once in a while I experience something like that among God's people. We actually look each other in the eye and admit that we're screwups and we can't get it right. In those all too rare moments something like the presence of God breaks through.

We're told all the time that what people are looking for is community. How sad is it that they're more likely to find it in a haze of tobacco smoke than in a worship service...

Why and How

There seem to be a lot of situations in which I'm discovering that I've mistaken the "How" of faith matters for the "Why".
For example; for a lot of years I thought the point of the Creation narrative in Genesis 1,2 was for me to be able to prove that the evolution my science teachers, friends, and family talked about was untrue. I don't see it like that anymore. In fact, I'm honestly not sure how old the world is or what mechanism God used to bring it into existence. What I am confident of is that some of the things I was taught in church were wrong (definitely in tone, probably in content.) The purpose of the Creation story is to remind us that all of the universe was made on purpose and for a purpose. It's not primarily about the how, it's the why.
Similarly, I thought for a long time that Jesus came to Earth to enable my personal salvation and to start his church. I'm pretty sure I had that wrong too. Jesus came to establish his kingdom. The church (and even me) are the tools he is employing to that purpose. The why and the how.
I've got this feeling I'm just scratching the surface of what all this is going to mean...

Labour day, Baseboards, and Talking To God

I spent a lot of the long weekend installing new baseboards and quarter round in my house. It's a funny thing. If you walked into my living room you probably wouldn't notice that it was done, but somehow it makes a real difference in the atmosphere of the room. It just brightens the space and makes it feel more complete with the new white baseboards rather than the old plain wood ones. It's a subtle difference in terms of observations but in terms less visceral it's dramatic.
So what? Well, in my typical spiritual ruminations I was comparing baseboards to prayer. I think a lot of prayer is essentially invisible. And I certainly can't prove that it makes a significant difference if someone wants observational proof. Yet somehow praying is dramatic in my life. Not so much for the objective answers, but for the less measurable but more significant way my life beomes brighter and more complete (not better necessarily, at least in the way most of us consider better).
Now, here's another thought. I never would have chosen to do the baseboards without Kristen's prodding. I wouldn't have thought it would make a real difference in the space or be worth the time and money involved. I was wrong (nothing newsworthy about that, Kristen is almost always right about household aesthetics). Often I need someone to draw me into prayer because I don't believe or can't remember that it really makes any difference.

Books and Getting "Tagged"

Another Book Quiz
Tagged by Chatter (I don't really know what tagging is but she put this on her blog and told me to do it to).
1. One book that changed your life: The Jesus I Never Knew - Philip Yancey
2. One book that you've read more than once: Everything I Really Need To Know I Learned in Kindergarten - Robert Fulghum (The whole book, not just the famous bit)
3. One book that you'd want on a desert island: Overdue book from the reserve section of the university library. I know they'd find me.
4. One book that made you laugh: Stupid White Men - Michael Moore
5. One book that made you cry: A New Kind Of Christian - Brian McLaren
6. One book that you wish had been written: What I'm Thinking - My Wife
7. One book that you wish had never been written: Great Expectations - High School nightmare
8. One book that you're currently reading: Quantum Zoo
9. One book that you've been meaning to read: Shelves full, I'll go with Through Painted Deserts - Donald Miller
10. Now tag 5 people: I doubt 5 people will ever read this...

Quantum Physics!?!?

So on my vacation I decided I wasn't going to read anything church related. I picked up a book by someone I heard interviewed on the CBC a few months ago. It's called Quantum Zoo and the idea is to take the most difficult aspects of theoretical physics and makee them understandable to someone without the background; like me.
Okay, I can't say the pages flew by or that I really get it all, but I did grasp some of the basic ideas on the outer edge of science. I guess it's not typical pleasure readding but it did stretch my brain in a new direction.
Most interesting to me is the idea that a lot of the assumptions I was taught in school are not entirely true. At it's most basic levels the universe doesn't play by the rules it's supposed to.

2 things that intrigue me:
-the ultimate truth of the universe is light, not time or space. The Bible says a lot about light as God's first creation, an aspect of his character, and the role his pople are supposed to paly in the world (Discuss)
-The endless debate about the source and age of the world really is pointless. Time and space are not necessarily consistent. What's more important than how or when the world began is why and by who...

Subjects and Objects

I've been thinking about the words "subject" and "object" lately. What do they mean in light of faith?

I want to be a subject. I want to be something that people talk about and consider; an active player in the dramas of life. I want to be worthy of careful study for those who wonder what I'm all about.
More than those though I want to be a subject of the king. One who lives under the care and direction of one who knows infinitely more than I do and loves completely. I want to be willing to subject myself to any challenge and cost in response to that love as I discover more and more about who my king really is.

In contrast, I don't want to be an object, one who is passive, one who stands in the way and disputes things. I don't want to be someone who life happens to.

Or maybe I just spend too much thinking about words...